Why not me?By the Revd. David Burgess
Unless you’ve been extraordinarily successful or supremely fortunate you’ll have had the common human experience at some stage in your life of not being chosen – in work, in sport, in your friendship groups. Sometimes the effects of seeing someone else in a place where you wanted to be are easy to shrug off; sometimes they can be devastating.
It happens in the Bible as well, several times in fact. I’d like to focus this month on a leadership competition between two unsung heroes of the New Testament and to see what we can learn from it.
After Jesus’s Ascension, his closest followers decided it was time to get back to everyday life and get busy working for the kingdom. First on their agenda was filling the gap left when Judas killed himself after betraying Jesus to his enemies. The Bible tells us that two men were suitable, Joseph and Matthias, and that Matthias was chosen to become part of the Twelve who would lead the early Church.
But what about Joseph, the man God didn’t pick? How do you live with the fact that you're the one not chosen?
I think I know more Josephs than I do Matthiases. They love God, but things haven’t worked out for them. What makes this kind of rejection so bad is that it’s God who’s doing it. The one not chosen must acknowledge the fact that “God didn’t pick me”. The lesson, whether in Christian ministry or everyday life, is this – we must help people to understand that being the one not chosen doesn’t mean “I’m a failure, I’m a reject”. I think there are two things that will help us in this.
Firstly, God is interested in who I am. Joseph and Matthias had something in common – they were both up to the job, and that’s important. Joseph wouldn’t have been considered if he hadn’t been ready to be chosen.
There are some things that I won’t be selected for even though I’m suitable. Why does this happen? It happens because some things are affected by human error or unclear discernment – and in some things God reserves the right to say “no”.
Secondly, God isn’t manipulated by what I want. He isn’t subject to our desires and wishes; he doesn’t obey us. That’s hard for us to accept because it means God can choose someone other than me and I have to trust him. How do I do that?
God will always do what’s right; he’ll always do what’s best for you; and sometimes, what you think should happen and what he plans to happen coincide exactly. But he won’t be manipulated by what you want.
So… Joseph had everything necessary to be an apostle – but Matthias got the job. Both men were suitable; only one could be chosen, and God made that choice. “Why not me?” is a cry heard quite often in Christian circles – albeit silently most of the time. “Not for now; I’ve got something else planned” is the reply. It may be a tough reply to hear, but it’s for the right reasons – always and without exception.